How do you build a life you love?

This is so important because a lot of times parents know what they value and who they value BUT when they look at their current life and what they spend a lot of their time doing, their activities don't reflect their values as much as they thought they would!    

If this is you - how do you get your values and your daily life to jive a little better?  

Check out my latest YouTube video on this topic! 

And keep in mind - I go back to reflect on this values and weekly activities, atleast once a year!  It's a constant work in progress :)  

Cause it's really easy to let time wasters or 'shoulds' sneak into your life!    

 

At the end of the day, I wish you a life you are satisfied with :)

You can choose to lay on your back and float through life or walk through your life a little more consciously as far as what gets your time and what doesn't!  

Wishing you all the best, 

Lisa xo

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Improve your Confidence Today!

Let's face it - having your marriage end is pretty friggin' hard on your confidence!! 

Feeling like a failure and ashamed that your marriage has ended, is the complete opposite of feeling Confident.

So, how do you rebuild your confidence when you're at an all time low?   

I'm literally bursting to help! :)  Click on the video below, for three ways you can rebuild your confidence, and get back on track as quickly as possible!

You might not believe it now but your confidence will improve after your divorce!  You are tougher and more resilient than you think - same goes for your kids! :)

 

 Wishing you all the best!

Lisa xo

 

 

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Getting Through Grief

There is a definite grieving process to having your marriage end.  Whether you were the one who finally ended it or not. 

The hopes you had for a family unit that was more traditional and less complicated. 

The hopes you had for your marriage and the vows you made.  

Needless to say, this can be a looong process. 

So be easy with yourself.  Be patient with yourself. 

With time and healing, your life will turn around. 

You will smile again and enjoy life again.

It is going to take some time though. 

So, be patient with yourself.  

And always remember - it is just a season.  So, keep the hope and faith, in knowing you aren't in a permanent slump.

My latest video is up, and in it I talk about ways to manage your grief, so you don't get overwhelmed or frustrated through the process of grieving..there's no too slow or deadline to be 'over grieving' by!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdr6I_7hMqM

 

You will find a new...

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Strategies to handle a High Conflict Ex

Dealing with a difficult ex can be incredibly stressful and influence the quality of your life for years.  

Let's take your power back!

Click the link below to watch my latest video: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mIkBp74SJjg

When dealing with a difficult person, it is extremely important to have firm boundaries on how frequently you engage with them.  You do not want them to have access to you at all times of the days and weeks - you'll be trading your peace of mind for constant stress and emotional turmoil.  

That's no way to live in the long run. 

You deserve a better quality of life than that!  And you are a better parent when you aren't constantly under stress and bracing yourself for the next problem.  

Click on the link below to watch my latest video, where I outline a few strategies on how to minimize the negative impact your high conflict ex will have on your life. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mIkBp74SJjg 

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Ways to Minimize the Heartbreak of Transitions

Ugghhhh....transitioning between two homes SUCKS terribly in the beginning!!  Terrible.  Heart wrenching.  The worst. 

I don't even have the words for it really. 

BUT 

It absolutely gets better. 

And it can be managed a lot easier with a few important tweaks to what you are already doing.   

Click here to watch my video now!

Hopefully it helps you stick handle the transitions so that your family can find their way to peace faster :) 

Here's the link again.

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How to get through being lonely

Loneliness completely sucks.  It can lead to feeling hopeless, which makes you despair that life isn't going to change.  

This isn't true.  Life will change.  There is always hope. 

Going through a Divorce is not the end of the world - it can absolutely lead to a better life if you believe it will :) 

Check out my video below for some simple things you can do today, that will start easing your feelings of loneliness.  And REMEMBER: YOU are NOT alone.  

Wishing you all the best co-parents! 

Lisa 

Life Coach - www.lisanicol.ca

 

 

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How To Tell Kids About Divorce

This is one of the most frequently asked questions from parents in our community - it's SUCH an IMPORTANT conversation you need to have with your kids.

This is definitely one of the hardest conversations you'll ever have. 

It's heart wrenching, it's terrifying. 

You don't want to disappoint your kids.  It's all true.

And it's totally human nature to want to avoid this kind of conversation.  Any kind of hard, shitty conversations really.  

BUT please don't avoid it

Don't brush over it with a rose coloured brush either.

Sit in your discomfort and talk to your kids about Divorce. 

I know that your love for your kids is WAY BIGGER than your discomfort and fear about your marriage ending.  

You can do hard things.  Your kids are looking to you to guide them through this.  

You can do it.

 Ok, Deep Breath. 

Now, that we are clear that you will have this conversation with your kids.  Here are some simple...

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What has Co-Parenting Taught You?

The top TWO things Co-Parenting has taught me:

.1 Good things can come from a difficult situation.  Let's face it, I would have probably never talked to my ex again - if we didn't have kids.  Way simpler and way less work.  But in the dust of our marriage ending, co-parenting has forced a different sort-of relationship to bloom.  It has expanded what I thought I was capable of and what I thought my ex was capable of.  We've grown as individuals and as parents, after years of negotiating and balancing everyones' schedules - as annoying as that is sometimes!

.2 My communication skills could be improved :)  Cause when nearly everything is in writing over email or txt, for reference, it’s easy to see where something could be misinterpreted or just not written clearly enough.  And you want to make sure you express yourself without ruffling any feathers, if that's not actually your intention.  So, communication skills become fine tuned like...

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Seeing Beyond the Shitty Situation

Let’s face it – as your marriage ends and you start your new life as a family with two homes, the shitty situation seems enormous, almost unmanageable, and whether or not you can actually climb over a shit pile that huge appears doubtful a lot of the time.

It’s true.

And for a long while you may not even be able to tell which way is up and which way is down, and if you’ve made any progress out of all this shit at all.

It sucks.  It really fucking sucks.

So, what can you do?

Believe it or not, you have choices. 

What will you do? 

I hope you’ll see beyond the shit.  To your version of a great life. 

Where you have someone to unconditionally love you and be your cheerleader in life.  To raising well adjusted and resilient kids.  Having the freedom to travel and vacation more often.  Those are just a few of mine :) 

Let that dream be your fuel, when you don’t think you have anything left in the tank.

And...

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5 Ways to be Supportive of a Newly Separated/Divorced Loved One

We’ve all been there, a friend or loved one is going through something really difficult and you just don’t know what to say or how to begin to make them feel better.

And we’ve definitely all been there, when you have a well-meaning friend or loved one and everything they try and say about your marriage ending just falls so flat or worse - actually offends you.  Or even super worse, people just avoid you all together because they don’t know what to say and feel like avoidance or saying nothing is actually better.

So, this got me thinking about when my marriage had newly ended, and how many people just never discussed it or ask how I was doing for what seemed like FOREVER.  Or if they did ask and I actually gave them a brief but honest answer, they simply weren’t prepared to just hold the space for me – they had no idea how to respond and just ended up standing their awkward until the topic of conversation was changed.  It never...

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