Is your co-parenting relationship as smooth as butter? Or more like chunky peanut butter?
If you wish it could be smoother and hate the texture of chunky peanut butter as it is, read on :)
Last week, my ex had an idea for changing the kids’ after school routine. Instead of mentioning it to me, the kids told me about it.
I was suddenly so angry and so surprised.
Normally we have a very smooth co-parenting relationship - so this caught me by surprise.
It wasn’t that the idea was a bad one at all. In fact, it made good sense. It was just that he hadn’t told me before the kids had.
Which left me thinking - holy smokes, I would have continued thinking the kids would be doing one thing after school and they’d actually be doing something completely different. My mama bear instincts immediately didn’t like that.
I sent him an email and as ‘just the facts’ like as I could, I told...
Was your response a resounding: YEEEESSSS!!
If not, read on :)
What does that voice in your head tell you day in and day out?
If you're wondering if you'll ever feel happy or fulfilled in your life after Divorce, I'm here to tell you - it's completely possible!
You can be happier than you've ever been in your life after Divorce :)
You don't have to tuck a piece of your heart away and be bitter for the rest of your life. You aren't 'less than' now that you're marriage has ended.
This is the perfect time to rebuild your life in the way YOU want.
And the thoughts you tell yourself in your head have a HUGE impact on what you think is possible for yourself.
So, here are some simple phrases to tell yourself when you catch your mind running through the mud too often:
I Deserve to be Happy
I fully and completely love and accept myself - I felt like a total fraud saying this to myself for months! So keep...
If you've been following me on instagram (@lisa_m_nicol) you already know that I met my ex's girlfriend a few weeks ago - they are moving in together in a few weeks, and it was definitely time to meet her in person!
She reached out to me, which I really appreciated. So, we met at a pub and sat down to chat for a few hours - and I was nervous!!
I mean, she will be the third most frequent person in my kids lives. (My boyfriend and I haven't moved in together yet, so he's got a less critical status in my kids' lives, to my mind).
And like my daughter said: hopefully she doesn't turn into an evil step mom when they start living together :I
Over the course of our meet up, I realized if I had met her several years back, when my ex and I had just split, this meeting would have gone much differently!
Having my kids influenced by someone I hardly know at all is a tough prospect and I would have been MUCH more inclined to want to control the whole situation...
This is so important because a lot of times parents know what they value and who they value BUT when they look at their current life and what they spend a lot of their time doing, their activities don't reflect their values as much as they thought they would!
If this is you - how do you get your values and your daily life to jive a little better?
Check out my latest YouTube video on this topic!
And keep in mind - I go back to reflect on this values and weekly activities, atleast once a year! It's a constant work in progress :)
Cause it's really easy to let time wasters or 'shoulds' sneak into your life!
At the end of the day, I wish you a life you are satisfied with :)
You can choose to lay on your back and float through life or walk through your life a little more consciously as far as what gets your time and what doesn't!
Wishing you all the best,
Let's face it - having your marriage end is pretty friggin' hard on your confidence!!
Feeling like a failure and ashamed that your marriage has ended, is the complete opposite of feeling Confident.
So, how do you rebuild your confidence when you're at an all time low?
I'm literally bursting to help! :) Click on the video below, for three ways you can rebuild your confidence, and get back on track as quickly as possible!
You might not believe it now but your confidence will improve after your divorce! You are tougher and more resilient than you think - same goes for your kids! :)
Wishing you all the best!
There is a definite grieving process to having your marriage end. Whether you were the one who finally ended it or not.
The hopes you had for a family unit that was more traditional and less complicated.
The hopes you had for your marriage and the vows you made.
Needless to say, this can be a looong process.
So be easy with yourself. Be patient with yourself.
With time and healing, your life will turn around.
You will smile again and enjoy life again.
It is going to take some time though.
So, be patient with yourself.
And always remember - it is just a season. So, keep the hope and faith, in knowing you aren't in a permanent slump.
My latest video is up, and in it I talk about ways to manage your grief, so you don't get overwhelmed or frustrated through the process of grieving..there's no too slow or deadline to be 'over grieving' by!
You will find a new...
Dealing with a difficult ex can be incredibly stressful and influence the quality of your life for years.
Let's take your power back!
Click the link below to watch my latest video:
When dealing with a difficult person, it is extremely important to have firm boundaries on how frequently you engage with them. You do not want them to have access to you at all times of the days and weeks - you'll be trading your peace of mind for constant stress and emotional turmoil.
That's no way to live in the long run.
You deserve a better quality of life than that! And you are a better parent when you aren't constantly under stress and bracing yourself for the next problem.
Click on the link below to watch my latest video, where I outline a few strategies on how to minimize the negative impact your high conflict ex will have on your life.
Ugghhhh....transitioning between two homes SUCKS terribly in the beginning!! Terrible. Heart wrenching. The worst.
I don't even have the words for it really.
It absolutely gets better.
And it can be managed a lot easier with a few important tweaks to what you are already doing.
Click here to watch my video now!
Hopefully it helps you stick handle the transitions so that your family can find their way to peace faster :)
Here's the link again.
Loneliness completely sucks. It can lead to feeling hopeless, which makes you despair that life isn't going to change.
This isn't true. Life will change. There is always hope.
Going through a Divorce is not the end of the world - it can absolutely lead to a better life if you believe it will :)
Check out my video below for some simple things you can do today, that will start easing your feelings of loneliness. And REMEMBER: YOU are NOT alone.
Wishing you all the best co-parents!
Life Coach - www.lisanicol.ca
Check out my first set of you-tube videos! :)
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Wishing you all the best,