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How to Improve your Resilience

Last week my twin girls had their 13th birthday - time flies doesn't it?   And I couldn't help but remember how I felt when I found out I was expecting them.

When we were told we were expecting twins, my world massively and suddenly flipped completely upside down - very, very similar to the way life feels right now. 

I was so concerned about the health of my babies - could I carry two healthy babies??  I mean, I had never even had one baby yet.

How would I continue to work while pregnant with twins, cause I'd probably have to take an early leave because of either my health of the twins' health. 

Two kids at once??  What??  Seriously.  What a feeling of overwhelm and fear and more scary thoughts. 

So, what's a girl to do? 

How'd I go from despair to laughter?  Click on this video to watch the rest the rest on video - f you prefer that to reading :)  

So, what's a girl to do? 

Dig Deep.  I was going to carry...

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How do you build a life you love?

This is so important because a lot of times parents know what they value and who they value BUT when they look at their current life and what they spend a lot of their time doing, their activities don't reflect their values as much as they thought they would!    

If this is you - how do you get your values and your daily life to jive a little better?  

Check out my latest YouTube video on this topic! 

And keep in mind - I go back to reflect on this values and weekly activities, atleast once a year!  It's a constant work in progress :)  

Cause it's really easy to let time wasters or 'shoulds' sneak into your life!    

 

At the end of the day, I wish you a life you are satisfied with :)

You can choose to lay on your back and float through life or walk through your life a little more consciously as far as what gets your time and what doesn't!  

Wishing you all the best, 

Lisa xo

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Stop Searching – You are the One You’ve Been Waiting For

I was on a retreat a month ago that changed my life forever.

It was called ‘Seduction of Spirit’ and is put on by the Chopra Center, which was founded by Deepak Chopra.  

I’ve been a HUGE fan of Deepak Chopra for over 20 years – I still vividly remember the first book I ever read of his, it was called How to Know God, and while it blew my mind at the time, it also rung so deeply true to me.  Like when your soul knows it to be true, it resonates.

And ever since, I’ve kept reading his books when they interest me and I’ve seen him speak a few times when he’s come to Ottawa.

I have a Civil Engineering degree, so I’ve got a naturally scientific mind and I’ve always loved the way he blends science with spirit & mind/body concepts. 

ANYWAYS, this retreat was primarily a meditation retreat – with lots of doses of yoga and talks with different mind/body teachers and researchers.  It was also in Sunny...

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Seeing Beyond the Shitty Situation

Let’s face it – as your marriage ends and you start your new life as a family with two homes, the shitty situation seems enormous, almost unmanageable, and whether or not you can actually climb over a shit pile that huge appears doubtful a lot of the time.

It’s true.

And for a long while you may not even be able to tell which way is up and which way is down, and if you’ve made any progress out of all this shit at all.

It sucks.  It really fucking sucks.

So, what can you do?

Believe it or not, you have choices. 

What will you do? 

I hope you’ll see beyond the shit.  To your version of a great life. 

Where you have someone to unconditionally love you and be your cheerleader in life.  To raising well adjusted and resilient kids.  Having the freedom to travel and vacation more often.  Those are just a few of mine :) 

Let that dream be your fuel, when you don’t think you have anything left in the tank.

And...

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5 Ways to be Supportive of a Newly Separated/Divorced Loved One

We’ve all been there, a friend or loved one is going through something really difficult and you just don’t know what to say or how to begin to make them feel better.

And we’ve definitely all been there, when you have a well-meaning friend or loved one and everything they try and say about your marriage ending just falls so flat or worse - actually offends you.  Or even super worse, people just avoid you all together because they don’t know what to say and feel like avoidance or saying nothing is actually better.

So, this got me thinking about when my marriage had newly ended, and how many people just never discussed it or ask how I was doing for what seemed like FOREVER.  Or if they did ask and I actually gave them a brief but honest answer, they simply weren’t prepared to just hold the space for me – they had no idea how to respond and just ended up standing their awkward until the topic of conversation was changed.  It never...

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What's your Divorce End Game?

How do you intend to live the rest of your life after Separation/Divorce'?

Write it down.  In detail.  Let's get real here.

I imagine your response is similar to what mine was, I just want to be happy, I want to be a good parent, and have good relationships with the people I love - especially my kids.  I want my relationship with my ex to have a flow and ease to it.  All great stuff!

Now close your eyes and in your mind's eye - really see it happening, imagine your life the way you want it to be, as if it's happening right now.  Who would be in your life?  How would you act towards others?

How would it feel?

Please, really do the visualization.  It's so powerful. 

It only needs to be for 5 mins or so!  You know you're onto something when you can feel your body physically responding to the visualization - like happy tingling and just an overall positive feeling building in your body.

Continue on with the visualization daily or weekly or...

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Get Unstuck by changing Your Perspective (Hint: Getting out in Nature Helps!)

Let’s face it – we all have days when we just want to keep our head in the sand, pull up the blankets in bed and stay there all day.  When it all looks too daunting to bother.  This is always when we are in dire need for a change in perspective.

Whether we want to admit it or not :)

Since this weekend is Thanksgiving in Canada, I’ve had my fair share of being outside and enjoying the leaves changing colour recently.  Going for a hike or just walking around a park, it’s amazing the way the landscape changes based on the season, and fall is one of my favourite seasons!

The enormity of it all always blows my mind – the look offs with their vistas, the beach looking out into an endless ocean.  The smallness of you and me.  It’s breathtaking.

Get your head out of the sand, out of your own problems, and look around – nature is spectacular!

And for me, it is a continual reminder that the world goes on – through good...

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Separation and Divorce: An Opportunity to Declutter Your Life!

When you're in the early months or years after Separation or Divorce – decluttering and minimizing your life is a must!  Your life depends on it.

When my ex and I had first separated several years ago, I remember feeling completely overwhelmed by the way my family life had changed in such a short period of time.  I had never lived on my own before, and while I’d call myself very independent, it was amazing to me how much I had to learn or relearn to completely run a household on my own.  Not to mention the mountains of emotional baggage I needed to sort through at some point.

At my most overwhelmed, I remember making a mental list - while I lay on my bedroom floor - of all the things I HAD to do to keep my life running.  The bare minimum.  Just the things required to ensure that what was left of my life wouldn't implode.  I had to work.  I had to feed the kids.  I had to do whatever was required to ensure the kids were...

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Let It Go!

authentically you hope Jan 06, 2017

Hi there!  And Happy New Year to you!  I wish you less static in 2017!

I am looking forward with great optimism to the year ahead – 2016 seemed like a year of ups and downs for me, so overall, I’m hoping that 2017 is a little more even keeled, a bit quiet and even dull (at times) would be welcome :)

And I confess, I am one of those people who LOVE to make lists of things I aim to do over the course of the year.  Especially because my birthday is this month, so the New Year seems to double down for me on both reflection and looking ahead.

However, this year I’ve noticed a distinct difference in my body, mind and soul.  This year, it feels more appropriate to focus in on a few goals and see them all the way through.  And more than a few of my goals are simple and quiet ones, such as ‘read all the unread books on my bookshelf’ – I’ve got two shelves full of books I’ve yet to read (I find it hard to resist buying a...

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Real and Loving Connection: Let it be Your Guide

I remember it very clearly.  I had been a zombie since my separation and felt like everything was unravelling in my life.  I had no idea where anything was headed and I was just trying to keep my day to day basics together (ie. drag myself to work, keep my job :), be as attentive to the kids as possible, eat, fall to bed exhausted, repeat).  I realized later on during a routine physical exam that I was also iron deficient for the first time in my life, which made everything feel more exhausting and my body more like molasses.

My life plan for one long marriage was gone.  What wrench did that throw into all my other plans for life?  Where was my life heading now?  I was coming up with nothing, as far as new life plans go..so I was just putting one foot in front of another until (hopefully sooner than later) purpose and/or passion returned to my life.

So, through all that fogginness, one summer's day, I found myself sitting on the front porch and the kids...

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